Into Madness Part 1

Madness is a descent. Sometimes it’s slow. Sometimes it is swift. Sometimes it’s like tumbling down a rabbit hole. 

You can’t help that. We’re all mad here.

There exists a land as dangerous as it is alluring where a young princess became a queen. Where a lover was frozen in time and driven mad by the memories that haunt him. 

How do you know that I am mad?

Eleven princesses escaped the Land of Wonder that night. One remained and her descent into madness was as quick as a hare. That was a mercy. His descent was as slow as a snail. And that was his punishment.

Oh but you must be or you wouldn’t have come here.

One princess vowed to return and rescue the two of them. That was her folly.

***

A White Rabbit hopped through the castle halls. This was the first odd thing one might notice. The second thing would be the pocket watch that the Rabbit had tucked into its waistcoat. And the most peculiar of all were the twelve princesses opening their doors one by one and following the Rabbit into the night. The youngest led the line, her eyes glossed over as if in a daze.

Each princess had this same look except for the two eldest, Louisa and her older sister Alice. Alice glanced over her shoulder before leaving her bedchamber, ensuring Evans was fast asleep like all the rest of the inhabitants of the castle.

Alice couldn’t remember the first time she followed the mysterious White Rabbit to the land of wonder and magic. She had gone alone that first night and had that same dazed look in her eyes that her younger sisters now had. She never wanted to leave and everything back home was forgotten: her beloved father, her dear sisters, her duty to the kingdom, even the man she loved with all of her heart. Nothing in the real world mattered to her, only the party where music compelled her to dance even after her feet ached, and the irresistible food that begged her to eat past her fill.

All of the guests were as enamored by Alice as she was with them. They poked and prodded Alice with their long claws, they danced with her even as she pleaded with them to stop, and they all vowed to keep her to themselves. And they would have but for the King who took an interest in Alice. She couldn’t remember the conversation they had that night but she did remember telling him about her adored eleven sisters and the following night, twelve princess followed the White Rabbit instead of just the one.

Instantly, Alice watched her sisters fall in love with the strange world and she quickly learned to keep her wits about her. It was only by keeping her senses in this topsy turvy world were they able to return to their beds before the dawn every single night. She made sure they stopped dancing, that they didn’t gorge themselves on food, and she did her best to make sure her sisters did not fall in love. 

But try as she might, she could not stop Louisa from falling in love. Not with a man but with that world. Over time, Louisa grew more and more distant in the day, only coming alive as day turned to night and the Rabbit would soon appear.

There was nothing Alice could do. She could not stop the White Rabbit from luring the princesses every evening. But she could ensure their safe return. Even as it seemed harder and harder for some of her sisters to leave.  

Louisa slipped her arm through Alice’s, giddy at another night of revelry. Alice smiled at her beloved sister, her closest friend in this world that knew everything about Alice, who always stood by her side through every joy and every heartbreak. It pained her to watch Louisa become a cold shell of what she once was in their world and she loved seeing her light up, even though the thing that now brought her joy threatened to steal her mind away.

“Do you think they’ll like my new dress?” Louisa asked, holding out a handful of her full skirt so that the torchlight caught the beading. The vibrant crimson color almost looked like blood cascading over her body.

“You’ll steal all the eyes this evening,” Alice assured her.

“The King has begun to favor me,” Louisa boasted, her cheeks flushing to match her dress. “The red really catches his attention.”

Alice’s stomach fell. She had indeed noticed the King drawing Louisa nearer and nearer to him and it terrified her.

“Perhaps you should stay by my side tonight,” Alice suggested. “We can dance together.”

Louisa frowned and drew her arm away.

The twelve princesses had left the warmth of the castle and ventured into the cold night. Not a single soul witnessed their venture, slumber holding everyone else captive but for one suitor who had promised the king he would find out where the princesses went to every night. He followed the young women in secret that night.

“Are you jealous that the King is more interested in me now?” Louisa taunted, her smug expression unmissable. 

“Of course not. I only worry about you. You know you can’t stay there.”

“And why not?” Louisa demanded, her face now reddening from anger. “I’ll be sent off to marry someday. Why shouldn’t I marry the King?”

“Louisa, perhaps you should stay behind tonight. We can talk about th – “

“I’m not talking about anything with you.”

And before Alice could stop her, Louisa went tumbling down the rabbit hole.

***

Evans kept his distance as he followed Alice and her sisters. His body still felt warm from the golden drink Louisa had given him that morning which freed him from the heavy slumber that fell upon the other residents of the castle. After Alice believed he was asleep, he quickly tugged on his boots and followed her all the way to the rabbit hole by the lake.

***

Alice wanted desperately just to crawl back into her bed and sleep the night away. But she would never abandon her sisters and she slid down and tumbled into the place known as Wonderland.

She fell in a free fall, but she felt no fear. It was as if she were floating, her dress billowing out to slow her, yet everything around her rushed by in a blur. Her feet gently touched the ground when she finally reached the bottom and she could already hear the music.

The door was wide open, welcoming the princesses into the world yet again. Crumbs of already snatched treats led the path to the party where princesses danced with the many odd inhabitants of this world.

Alice had danced with and conversed with many of them in previous nights. The young woman with the vibrant purple petals of a pansy for hair was the best dancer and the older gentleman whose lower body was that of a blue caterpillar had the best conversations, though he often blew plumes of smoke from his pipe into Alice’s face when he talked

But Alice did not want to talk or dance tonight. She wanted to keep her sisters safe. Especially Louisa.

A hand clasped her shoulder and Alice turned to find Evans here in this strange Land of Wonder. Her stomach sank, her heart racing as she realized her lover had somehow followed her here.

Alice immediately pushed Evans to a dark corner, shrouded in thick foliage and mushrooms the size of them. She had seen firsthand what happened to intruders here. It was a fate worse than death and it was why the princesses never told anyone where they went every night.

“What are you doing here?” Alice whispered, looking over her shoulder to make sure no one had seen him. Everyone seemed too preoccupied to glance their way, but nothing escaped the King’s notice for long.

“I told your father I would tell him the answer,” Evans explained. “So that we could finally marry.”

The king had been desperate to learn the truth of what caused his precious daughters to disappear every night, for he had lost his beloved queen one day when she vanished in the night and no one had seen her leave. He feared the same would happen to his daughters and so to entice one to follow the princesses, he offered up their hand in marriage. Many had undertaken the task but every one of them had failed. In his rage, the king had executed them all the next morning when they were found fast asleep while the princesses had run off on another evening of dancing.  

“I told you not to,” Alice reminded him, bewildered he had went against her wishes. “You will be hanged like all the others.”

“No, because I found you,” Evans explained, taking Alice’s hands in his. His smile was bright, hopeful of their future marriage.

But Alice knew better. “How? How did you escape the sleep spell?”

“Louisa gave me a drink. I feel more awake than ever.”

“Louisa?” Alice whipped around, remembering her sisters. Ten princesses danced and ate like usual but Louisa was with the King.

The King of this land was a terrifying being, yet so enthralling. One could only dream of being in his presence, to feel his eyes on them and be the center of his attention. But his temper was unpredictable and that made him haunting.

Alice had seen him turn a prince into a frog and boil him alive and a woman into a fish who floundered and gasped for air for several minutes before he changed her back. Their offenses had been so miniscule that Alice could not even remember them.

And yet, he was so captivating. He had a strange handsomeness that Alice could not quite understand but she wanted to be by his side, even though her heart belonged to Evans.

“I had no choice,” Evans whispered. “Your father found a husband for you.”

Alice pursed her lips. They both knew this day would come when she would be forced to wed a future king and have to say goodbye to her knight. As much as they wanted to pretend it would never happen, they could not escape it.

“Do not let anyone see you,” she whispered, squeezing his hands. “When you see us leave, run.”

Alice left Evans in the shadows and made her way through the crowd, rejecting all the offers of food and dance. Louisa did not notice Alice, all her attention on the King. And the King only had eyes for Louisa in her beautiful crimson dress.

“Sire,” Alice interrupted, bowing to the King. He had always shown an interest in her and favored her more than anyone so se felt little fear in getting his attention. “If I may, I would like to borrow my sister.”

“Oh but I’m not ready to give her up,” he replied, grinning with his pointed teeth, exaggerating his foxlike features.

Louisa scowled at her sister, visibly annoyed by the interruption. “We’ve nothing to discuss anyway.”

“My King if I may. I’ve learned that I am to be wedded and only wish the chance to be with my sister before all my time is devoted to my husband.”

“A marriage?” the King asked, his interest piqued as high as his brow. “I could marry you to one of my courtiers this moment so that you may remain forever.”

“What a splendid idea,” Alice remarked, for she had learned to never say no to the King. “But I’m afraid none of your courtiers have taken my heart.”

“Such a shame that none has stolen your heart yet, my dear Alice. Perhaps I ought to take care of that.” He reached out and ran a long claw over Alice’s beating heart and goose pimples erupted over her skin. “I am in need of a new queen.”

But before Alice could find the words to reject him, before the King could take her heart unwillingly, Louisa raised her hand and pointed a finger at the shadows where the intruder lurked.

“He followed us here.”

Thick, thorny roots emerged from the earth, snaking their way through the shadows. There was no where to hide, no way to escape, for the land obeyed the King and the roots coiled around Evans legs and dragged him out into the open.

“Louisa,” Alice gasped, her body numbing at the thought of what was to come.

But her sister only returned a grin, amused and triumphant.

The King stepped away from the sisters, approaching the knight who struggled against the roots holding him down. “I did not invite you to my kingdom.”

“I won’t allow you to steal these princesses any longer,” Evans shouted, defiant despite the terror most felt radiating from the King.

“Please sire,” Alice begged, stepping forward. Everyone around them collectively took a step back, afraid of the King’s wrath. “This is the man who holds my heart. I beg that you let him go.”

“Alice, you should know by now. I hold the heart of everyone in this land. I rule over them, even yours. I am the King of Hearts.”

“My apologies, my King. I only meant he holds my heart in our world. And I beg you to show mercy.”

“Have I not shown mercy to you and your sisters every single night?” He slowly walked around Evans, the claws of his fingertips seeming sharper than before. “I allow you into my kingdom, I give you food and entertain you. I let you return home. And you betray me?”

“I did not let him follow me. I have told no one of your kingdom.”

“And yet, here he is.”

The King grabbed Evans’ hair and pulled back, running one of those long claws along his neck slowly.

A bell chimed, all at once distant and ringing in Alice’s head.

They had to leave.

Now.

Alice looked at the crowd, her ten younger sisters cowering among the inhabitants of this land.

“If you leave, you may never return,” the King warned.

Alice’s heart raced as another bell chimed, piercing her ears and rattling her head.

Her sisters all stared at her, terror in their eyes. They just wanted to go home.

Evans met her eyes. He too was afraid, regretful of following Alice to this dangerous land. Nevertheless, he nodded. He knew what Alice had to do.

A third bell rang. Alice grabbed the hand of the sister nearest to her. She then grabbed another sister’s hand, and she did the same until eleven of the princesses held onto one another.

“You will never see him again,” the King taunted.

The fourth bell rang and Alice looked back at Louisa. She offered her hand but Louisa retreated back, out of reach.

The fifth and final bell echoed. If they didn’t leave now, they would be trapped forever. Their kingdom would soon be waking and looking for the princesses.

Alice ran before it was too late.

And as she ran, the King shouted after her, “He will lose his head. And you will lose your mind.”

***

Alice was in love. She fell in love many years ago with a knight named Evans who had grown up alongside her in the castle. He had been her first everything: her first friend who wasn’t one of her sisters, her first kiss, her first love.

Alice dreamed of marrying Evans and letting her heart be full. But she knew that could never be. For Alice was the eldest, expected to take the throne one day as queen. And it was not only her age that made her the perfect heir for the throne. Alice was kind and clever and loyal. The people loved her and awaited her rule with anticipation.

Evans knew and accepted that their love would not last. They relished every moment they could steal away before that fateful day until one night, Alice vanished and returned with the soles of her shoes worn through.

No matter how much Evans begged her to tell him what happened, something scared her enough to prevent her from doing so. Even when the king offered a marriage to one of his daughters as a reward for finding out where the twelve princesses went to each night, Alice made him promise not to try and win her hand.

And Evans agreed until Alice was finally spoken for and his heart could not take it. For several nights, he did all he could to resist the sleeping spell that befell the inhabitants of the castle at night and learn the truth of the princesses’ escapades but to no avail.

Until one day Louisa approached him with a bottle filled with a golden drink. For Louisa was the only one in the world who knew Alice’s secret. She had discovered it and vowed to never tell another soul, for she saw her sister’s love for the knight and did all she could to protect it. So when she promised Evans that the golden liquid would keep him awake and he could follow them, he trusted her.

But now, Evans was trapped in the Land of Wonder, undoubtedly suffering every moment he was there.

The King had vowed that Alice would never return but that would not stop her.

***

Alice’s eyes fluttered open. Her heart raced in her chest despite lying in her bed, dressed in her nightgown. Her shoes were still on her feet, the soles worth through yet again.

Alice pushed herself upright, still groggy as if coming out of a dream. But of course, she knew it was no dream. No, everything that happened that night was very, very real. Evidenced by the empty blanket next to her bed where she would find Evans every morning.

She couldn’t understand how he had followed her. How he managed to stay awake.  She stepped out of her bed, her feet aching as they always did the next morning. As she stepped across the room, her foot kicked something hidden beneath the blanket.

Alice knelt and found a bottle, half full of a golden liquid. From it’s neck hung a little tag exclaiming “Drink Me!”

Her heart sank, her hands beginning to tremble. She recognized the strange bottle as one of the many she had seen in the Land of Wonder. But how did Evans come to possess it?

Alice’s door flung open and she shoved the bottle into her pocket.

Her father ran into her room, disheveled and frantic. When his eyes fell on Alice, he breathed a sigh of relief that didn’t quite take away his distress.

“My dear Alice,” he breathed as he wrapped her in his arms. “Where is your sister?”

Alice’s heart ached once more at the memory. Louisa turning away, refusing Alice’s hand, and choosing to remain in Wonderland.

Alice wanted nothing more than to tell her father everything and have him send and entire army to that land to retrieve Louisa and Evans.

But as Alice opened her mouth to speak, she found no words, her throat swelling shut. She clutched at her neck as if afraid her head would topple over. The madness that always tried to dig into her mind during her visits to Wonderland crept upon her as she tried to tell her father the truth.

But she could never utter a single word to anyone. Even as days and days passed and her sister did not return to them.

The kingdom mourned the loss of their princess who had vanished the same way their beloved queen had many years ago. The youngest princess was just shy of her first year when her mother vanished.

And Alice mourned Evans alone, the only suitor to escape his hanging after failing to tell the king where the princesses went each night. This was the only relief that the king saw in the days after Louisa’s disappearance. For Alice’s betrothal to a simple knight would have devastated the kingdom. But now that he was no longer beholden to that promise, he brought Alice’s true suitor to the castle.

The young prince was the only child of the widowed king of the kingdom to the east and the marriage proposal included the annexation of the land, further growing the kingdom.

He arrived with fanfare and a proclamation of the engagement, giving Alice no chance to object, not that she would ever be given a chance to. And so, Alice had to meet her future husband the day of their announced wedding.

He was handsome, a suitor that would make any young woman swoon. Louisa would’ve fallen for him instantly if she were still here.

Alice’s heart broke a little more. She feared one day it would finally shatter into too many pieces to ever be repaired. She had slept very little in the weeks following that fateful night and the madness continued trying to claw its way into her mind day after day. Alice saw the same haunted expression in her sister’s eyes. They too wanted to go back but could not.

And so, the prince met his betrothed. Despite the exhaustion, Alice was beautiful and quick-witted, and the prince approved. Their marriage would broaden the kingdom and they would have a competent king.

When her father announced the wedding would happen the first day of spring, Alice’s heart formed another crack. Winter would end in only mere weeks.

She must return to Wonderland before that day.